Inside My Mind….. By L D Wright

Inside My Mind…..

So yesterday I freely opened up to a perfect stranger, now I’m not completely sure if this was the first time or are the words I’ve already wrote  my true witness.
Do the people who follow this blog count as an audience I relinquish my faults, my weakness, my thoughts, my history.
Writing became the therapist I invest in. Is it an A2Z of the journeys I’ve made, make, or yet to partake or do our paths cross because they’re the stories previously written. We haven’t  reached those chapters, those pages still lay unopened. Are we preprogrammed, make choices yet still end at the same outcome.
Have I sent myself to re-ab with the words I choose to write, Is this journal what I was meant to start, just took until now before I pressed send and now your reading the labyrinth from inside my mind.
They say we all have a book buried inside each and every one of us, did someone write it now we fall from those upturned pages, living out their words until we finally put the book back down again.


What I thought had sank decided to resurface, now I’ve got to write about a story that I honestly thought tried to leave me, it didn’t leave, I just forget which words to use and took a while to rearrange the pages.


My ink ran dry now my thumbs delve into the very realms, pressing the memories I find hard to let out. These icy cold reminders, thoughts thawing as I write them.


Currently there’s 129,864,880 books out there for you to feast your eyes upon so personally I’m not expecting any kind of Cult following, mines not even written yet but if you choose to read this blog then thanks, it’s all about me, my life, My Darkest Journal,Inside My Mind.
By,
Lee David Wright

Part of the mainframe…..        By L D Wright

Part of the mainframe…..

Are we part of something so much larger. Are we billions of Alexas thumbs feeding our need to learn, seeking knowledge.

We face the disruption of the memories we lose like some computer generated virus has spread amongst our world. Viral, unstoppable commands reach out to us like implants wired deep inside our brain.

We search for missing data we lose along the way, analyse what’s given, hold onto what we’ve saved. Their attacks bite the random acts of man, no delete for the savagery they’ve shown.
We are programed with endless lists of data, some intertwined mixed emotions, unable to decipher. Some with messages, hidden files that float around the background. The broken links, unobtainable connection. Sorry but your data just expired, check your cables or contact your Internet provider.

Are we all hardwired yet some are given boundaries. Do we all become the programmed simply by pressing enter until we repeat the process to finally meet our maker. Have we compiled an ever growing novel, the Internet explorer, The World’s Largest Encyclopedia we all borrow.
Are we all linked to Google thanks to Larry Paige & Sergey Brin, Did Mark Zuckerberg join the dots just to see where we’ve all been.
These instruments we now bow down to like visiting The Queen.
Searching the confides of our history, the do and don’ts of social feeds. Are we friends of computer generated images, are we lost on the searches no longer with us. Are we nations of writers, likes and followers, do we need these apps like we desperately purchase appliances.
Do we now just sit and turn on lights, do keyboard warriors press send to simply start their fights. Are we all bugged by the WiFi connection, are we now living as one giant supersized computer, everyone pressing on into the future.
To say that the phone was once a tool we talked through. Now it’s an item we all seem to silently cling and daze into. Mr Alexander Bell must be looking down thinking wow, what have I created. Can we all press delete and start over. Are we the programs that last forever or does something else simply just take over.   

Have we become so A.I dependant we’ve transformed into skin covered carbon copied robots? Thanks to TimBL for plugging the world into all of us…..Send.
By,
Lee David Wright

Peace on Earth….. By L D Wright

Peace on Earth…..

They march, on and on until they fall, replaced by another trigger until they also march no more. Governments send our young and brave, so many now not walking these streets. It’s a job  they loved but at the ultimate cost, sadly can’t replace a corpse.

I have nothing but respect for the ones that wear those berets, still a massive shame to see all those covered graves. Measured proud like they’re still on parade. A resting place with no carry on because they lost against another gun.

Their lost souls home and foreign soils, not trained to stop flying bullets.  I salute the fallen, I salute their family members who didn’t sign up for these savage reminders.

  Our brave warriors past and present keep marching forward, I pray that God watches over. This ground has swelled beyond its needs,  it’s a job so please don’t bleed.

Life is threatened globally, humanity or just plain stupidity. We are supposed to be a race of superior beings yet we practice with ease at becoming savages. These days we can do almost anything, let’s start by stopping all the killing and atrocities.

People crossing boarders because they can’t survive their war torn countries. Threats of war all over todays news feeds. Are we so close to world war 3?. This is 2020 not the damn dark ages.


We can’t even get along with each other yet we scan the skies for life. Honestly, would we offer them in with open arms? . They’d take one look, turn around and find a more peaceful world.  Probably take an alien invasion for everyone to stand up to save  our planet before we believe we can actually live in peace together.
  It’s about time our leaders got their houses in order before some godly force descends and does it for us.
By,
Lee David Wright

“They say the pen is mightier than the sword, let’s all become Superheroes”

Change Minds….. By Lee David Wright

Change Minds…..

I’m just like you, your just different in so many ways, regardless of looks, colour, religion, we still bleed the same. You may own a private jet, drive 2020 sport’s cars, I drive a shed with wheels but I’ll still hold a door open, manners cost nothing, regardless.


I might lack your silver spoons, extra blankets had too keep me warm. Your bank balance maybe higher than I’ve ever been but have you seen some of the glorious pics I’ve walked in-between.


Life challenges, you manage effortlessly whilst I perform a balancing act like that’s how life’s supposed to be.  These hands cut steel, that steel cuts me, you cut a deal, I didn’t get that chance but I’m still working at life.


  One day your not going to wake up, happens to all of us. I know that doesn’t take a genius. You might be flying high but believe me we’re all heading in the same direction, you can’t buy that last extra breath, make the most of the priceless ones we get.


I know you don’t know me but ask yourself this would you allow yourself too. Is that divide just too far apart, are you apparently better because your cut from a different cloth or is that a lie you’ve sadly become accustomed to.
The rich get richer, we survive.  You either have more than enough dough or live life on the bread line, doesn’t mean you deserve it, just means you got lucky or faced life with a definite lack of it.

Take a good look around but first look into the mirror.  Self made billionaires, hats off to you but you can’t buy happiness, love, respect, that’s earnt, given not  purchased like some sort of annual subscription.

Governments hiding behind the ones they let us elect, puppets with strings pulled behind their velvet curtains. Wars because they have more minerals, why do they die too fill up our vehicles.
The list is endless, deep greedy pockets. Privalaged individuals pillaging the rest of us. It’s a shame we have to become rich or famous before people start  listening, wonder how many people have the heart to agree even share this.

Now don’t get me wrong I’m not jealous of your wealth, your personal toys, your house. I might never eat in the same fancy restaurants, spend fortunes but I’ve lived, count my fortune with what I hold on my heartstrings. Yes we all live such different lives, depends how we live it that, “Changes Minds”.


By,
Lee David Wright

I Applaud YOU, You Survived….. By L D Wright

I Applaud You, You Survived…..

Unpredictable moments stick, almost haunt us. The times life changed and challenged us. We didn’t break, we thought we couldn’t handle it,  guess again, you’ve got this.

We’ve fought battles we didn’t intend to be a part of, life chose to pick on us but we don’t have to be held responsible, sometimes events happen, we are not prisoners, don’t let it dictate the outcome no matter the heartache that found you.

Life challenges  the best of us, makes or breaks us.  Stand up, this walk is one you’ll make regardless. The calm before the storm  surrounds you, before you realise the life you lived disowned you. Don’t let it take you down the paths you’ll definitely become lost on, I’ve been there so plan your routes, choose another one.

I’ve been left with scars from the battles I became part of, some brought me down  to levels I didn’t recognise, even mirrors hid it from plain sight. Life’s not about what you’ve been dragged through, it’s all about today before it left you. You didn’t change, life taught you.

Forgive, forget, only choices we are left with. The one we see today broke the  chains that shackled, you carried on and I appload you. Days are always darker just before the dawn, be thankful you get another chance, another sun.

Your here for a short time so make each given count. Pray to your God’s if that gives you strength. At the end of the day you get one chance. Look back on days that made you fight back, life can be a struggle but also a miracle to have tried, look again, You Survived.

By, Lee David Wright

In Warm Loving Hands by L D Wright

In Warm Loving Hands…..

I’ve fought with my thoughts, the presents I would have given, knowing full well they’d never be opened. Searched for the smiles I’d hoped to have seen, missed all the laughter we’d have shared without thinking.

Looked to the skies, watching the clouds floating around, made out the pictures before merging from sight.

Starred deeply into nights blackened skies, scanned for the stars, those glistening twinkles show me just were you are. I often speak to the air that surrounds me, hoping your voice flutters by to reply me. My hands always open for you to hold on to, sometimes I feel yet my eyes never see you. If only a visit could be arranged, they’re now just the thoughts I live with today.

Still makes me smile to see their little eyes light such a shame yours closed before we shared our best times. So long ago now but still hurts today when my angels left but daddy stayed.

So once again later when the stars start to shine I’ll talk to the heavens whilst holding your hands. I miss you more than I ever thought possible, close my eyes whilst I secretly hold you.

To any parent, family member out there that lives with this pain, I feel you, don’t let it take all of your smiles, think of the memories you hold in your heart. At any time it all becomes hard look to the heavens and search out their stars..

I know it’s a task, I know tears will fall but love lasts forever, those thoughts never go. That memory, those smiles we were lucky to have found , keeping the best ones we carry around. They may have left us but they stay in your heart. Just keep going forward like that cloud changing picture,make every day different.

Today’s just a memory of how much we miss you. Today we returned to yesterday’s smiles and the times that I held you in warm loving hands.
By,
Lee David Wright

“Play nicely until we meet again”

Something a little different…..

Something a little different but might sit with some.



Does my soul keep letting go, are the jolts at night reminding me we are not alone. Led there motionless then out of nowhere my chest explodes, am I astral projecting or is something else happening, am I falling asleep too quickly, is my body just restarting with a kick. These jumps aren’t minor, they run through me like they’re shouting. A million instant reasons too quickly inhale what’s needed, a two second feeling that my soul just tried to leave me, more than a little strange believe me. Woke up this morning so I’m still breathing.


When I was younger I use to dream that I was flying, I’d see myself leaving through the open window, felt the dips like riding the roller coaster, a very weird feeling, even stranger was the way I’d come home and settle down again like I was floating just above the bed sheets, happened many times but I never felt scared, excited more than anything. Love to feel that float again.
Later in life I’d lie there awake unable to move, no sounds I’d make, I’d try but the shouts couldn’t be heard. Felt like a wind travelling over me but I could swear I was still wide awake not sleeping.


Still unable to move but I’m sure I saw something else was there, rushing around, smaller than me, I’m sure there was about three. I’m really not sure if my mind played those tricks or a visit from something I didn’t understand I’d just witnessed. Maybe a ghost, maybe a demon or maybe just maybe a neighbour from a far away system.


I’m sure night terrors are much more than we truly know, these visits lasted years and sometimes still appear. The feeling you get is really powerful, can’t get up because this force won’t allow you. I don’t understand what the hell had been happening but believe me it’s much more than alarming.


Knowing what someone else is thinking, feeling, a sign I’m psychic or a paranoid beginning of the first stage of madness. Don’t let me make eye contact or you might give away secrets, I’m only joking but at times I’ve felt this. So if anyone has felt like this piece of writing let me know, be great to hear from you, write soon.
Before I go I hope you have a great Christmas and a fantastic New Year, may 2020 be a year to remember.
Ps don’t eat too much cake and thanks for reading Inside My Mind, My Darkest Journal

By L D Wright

You’ve got this….. By L D Wright

Life’s regrets, upsets, setbacks, resets, head in hands as time ticks away, deliberating what happens next, locked in turmoil as the thoughts click, fists clenched, deep breaths before reaching a calming influence to ease your mind.

We can all become our own worst enemy, our actions deploy the crowds  judgement of what they want to see. Those in glass houses should never throw stones, pain hides well behind the tears that fall.

We all wear shoes but we haven’t tied everyone’s laces, walk their mile without your heart aching. Never judge the book by its glossy image, their pages turn amazing stories that you may not have dreamt or witnessed.

Behind some smiles hide a life of struggle, times we found so hard to feel let alone deal. Sometimes we go completely off the rails, just need kind hands to guide us  towards calmer days.

You’ll find that kindness behind the most unlikely eyes, the ones we greet with thankful smiles throughout our lives. Press your reset and carry on. What came before this didn’t take your life, certainly rearranged so many smiles, thoughts and outlooks may have changed but its all about now, today, come on you’ve got this.

They say times a healer, yeah time is all you need, after a certain period you learn how to deal with anything, it might still hurt, your heart doesn’t forget  but I promise you your stronger than you ever thought possible, especially when life itself decides to come knocking.


By,

Lee David Wright

Searching….. By L D Wright

Searching…..

We are all searching, somethings we find easily, others camouflaged, there yet hidden out of sight, trophies we come across, the buried treasure that someone else lost. Silver spoon or extra blankets. We’re all the same, just wear different outfits.

Walking down that lonely path until a thought provokes a smile we’d witnessed, leads us hand in hand with yesterday’s feelings. The silence stings but the birds still singing. Life carries on whatever we’ve been through.

To lose those gems you thought would stay forever, life takes your dreams, makes us walk into others. The sound of battles we found ourselves face, echoes beat each fall we embraced.

Contemplated scenarios I never dreamt possible, life is beautiful yet also so hostile. Lost digits, lost sight, broken bones, lost my most treasured love but I’ll still make you smile, laugh and joke.

Life either breaks you or makes you stand up, roll that dice, another chance, a game of luck. One we take every single step, every single second, live today for tomorrows never promised.

Some search forever, some just give up, some don’t even consider what they’ve already got. Some search for treasures all of their lives, if only they’d seen what’s infront of their eyes.

By,
L D Wright

Happy Birthday Princess…..

Days as important as today should never fade away, just like a memory I carry you around, granted I haul the sadness alongside the smiles you created but the love I cherish has never left. All the missed moments, the new adventures, the stories we would have made. I’ve took you with me every single day. A thought of you walking by my side, your hand holding mine. Each time I’ve looked towards the skies, day or star covered nights, all the times I’ve spoke to you, I pause for your reply. Today I was stuck in traffic, still spoke the words,

“Happy Birthday Princess, Happy Birthday Kirsty”.

I may be able to carry you forever, without ever resting to gain my strength, the only weight I feel is gathered in my heart, I feel you there every single day, that’s your resting place where you’ll always stay.

We may never have had the chance to wish upon a star, our rainbows fade before gaining glorious shades but I’m still so proud to have called you my Daughter. That unbreakable piece of perfection I felt when I held you in my arms, my personal piece of paradise,

Daddy’s little Princess, sweetdreams sweetheart.

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