Hi….. By L D Wright

“Hi”…..

I wonder how many people in the world are crying right now?
How many people live with pain they don’t know how to let out.
If they all cried together would everbody feel just how much they hurt, would they offer help, some for sure, others just turn the music up, drown them out.

If we all helped how many more smiles would flood this earth, smiles better to hear laughter instead of painful heartfelt hurt.

I wonder if everyone who cried today stood up, would they outnumber the ones still sat.
Is the whole world crying or just the ones brave enough to cry out loud not hiden from the crowds.

Anyone out there without a broken heart hug the ones just yards apart.
Don’t close your eyes and pretend it’s all ok, might be you who needs the love one day.

Do we all need to walk around with this noose around our necks before you all stand up and be a friend. It’s not a fault nor a weakness to ask for help, everyone’s a therapist with abilities, only takes a moment, lets all stand up, it’s time to start listening.

Start by saying “Hi”, that conversation might actually change someone’s life.
It’s really not that hard, lend a hand, be a shoulder, show support.

Build a future we all feel part of, the benefits you receive are worth more than gold or diamonds.

People’s mental health is priceless. Some people have fallen way below rock bottom, let your hands become their ladder.

So today if you help atleast one person wipe away their tears, feel the love, today’s been worth it.

I’ll start this roller coaster of emotions rolling,
“Hi, Im Lee, how are you” ?

Fade into Invisible Features by L D Wright

Fade into Invisible Features…..

I often fall into my past, dragged back in fact. From the highest peak too the lowest depths. Falling towards the savage reminders, embracing the impact with devastating consequences.

Led motionless until the thoughts flood, just another nightmare without my eyes shut. Never underestimate the power of the mind, it bends too ridiculous lengths, plays scenes you thought you’d left behind.
Traps you in darkness, locked in battle with your demons.

It doesn’t hold back, it’s as serious as cancer. Mood changing, obliterating, hides the tears but heightens the fears, yet still allows confused smiles year after year, a constant reminder that rips at the layers until it finally uncovers the scars that life gave us.

Bare ,broken moments that live amongst us. Trying hard to find the remedy before this illness takes hold and screams out the rage that engulfs those around us .Going insane whilst smiling, hiding the tears that choke you.

Unable to talk for fear of breaking, not realising your already broken. Silence seems to be the way, inside your screaming, the noise deafening but nobody hears it. Like walking around in a festival of demons torturing your mind, crippling your sences, ending the beginning before it even starts playing.

Eyes closed, fists clenched, praying for a way out. A front row ticket, a solo performance and the spot lights glaring as you fall into darkness, despair wraps its ugly grip around you. A non stop permanent abuse of what happens when life tests you.

Held in a constant state of disbelief, terrified the horror stays, it never leaves. Pushing forward, taking back this fight, lighting up the shadows so the demons have no place to hide. Ripping up the darkness letting the sunshine cloak the past, learning whatever tried to break you actually didn’t take your heart.

Standing up and walking right on through no matter if the demons tag along. When life slips, sidestep, stop, adjust, take your time. Learn from yourself and how you’ve coped, listen to your voice, the one inside, it’ll tell you everything you need to know when life earnt you deep scars from all the low blows.

Dark thoughts washed in sunshine, new plans going forward on your time line. A new you with an old story to tell but one that writes a better version filled with smiles, happier ones. You can use your past too rebuild your future watching as your demons Fade into Invisible Features.

Use your Memories and rewind to smiles, banish the sad tones, visit happier occasions. Remember the next time you fall, head towards the positive side and relive those moments like you once loved. You can achieve any impossible task no matter what came to brake us. You’ve got this.

By
Lee David Wright

Sound of Silence….. By L D Wright

Have you ever heard the sound of silence?

No distracting beeps, engines, rushed footsteps, children’s tantrums, no interuptions just silently bliss silence.

Did everyone just fall asleep, did we all switch off and pressed reset. What’s this noise without voice or rumble.

Is silence the sound of peace that quietly surrounds or just a break in the daily madness we drown.

Have you ever been so deep into the woods the wind actually stops, the only noise is the birds but you can’t help listen to their glorious songs.

Every now and then I catch myself listening to the noiseless shock, silence waiting for the pin to drop.

The 4am visits, just me and my heart beat, slight rustle of the bedsheets.

It’s something you can’t really search yet it finds you the moment your not listening like it was patiently waiting to greet you.

That distant feeling when it all becomes so quiet, welcoming chances to deflect the hustle and bustle of everyday lifestyles.

Does silence truly exist or do we get lost in the daydreams, just forgetting as it fades into hushed seconds before life starts again.

Whatever it is, it’s welcome, this bedlam is deafening but so is the opposite.

Is silence just noise we simply haven’t heard yet.

By,

L D Wright

“I urge you all to go experience your perfect piece of silence, let it find you as you realise it’s all gone so shshsh”

Life lent you

We would all rather float to the top of Everest but life’s about the footsteps not the easy options.

We would all rather have an open chequebook, instead life reminds me how close to broke I could be.

We’d all rather have the answers but life time and time again showed me no one knows tomorrows outcomes.

I’d love a luxury pad, acres as far as the eye could scan, I’ve settled for the walks I’ve took, everydays different if you care to look.

Rather take it in and hear myself say “Wow”, better to experience what you can than wish on if onlys, maybes just cloud your mind.

I’d rather take hikes in the rain than stay in the darkness waiting for the sun to drench my face.

I’d rather have a family and true friends than create false likes from the fake ones.

Rather take it day by day than look back and regret every choice I’ve ever made.

This story may have already been written but it’s up to me to fill the gaps you might be missing.

I think we’ve all lived life through eyes of The Joker, Joaquin Phoenix painted a realistic picture we’ve all witnessed one time or another.

Why does life throw so much chaos, disruption, disorder. Why live with a notion half full, half empty, flip it, it’s better than living with absolutely nothing.

Whatever level your living be grateful your still breathing. Money doesn’t make you happy, happiness comes from the memories that found you.

Doesn’t take a billionaire to experience treasures you just can’t purchase. Look around, think a second, see the gems life lent you.

Cry with the sad tones, smile with the great ones, be thankful you got the chance to share them.

By,

Lee David Wright

Why did they have to suffer….. By L D Wright

What did life become to deserve these thoughts.
Kids being abused, treat like slaves.
I’d have never let any harm hurt them yet they still left this rock we call earth, our home now without them.
How come so many people regardless of education, status, treat kids like second class citizens.
I’d have treat mine like royalty without Andrew not destroy their thoughts and future daydreams.
I’m a family man with a heart that melts around kids, how the hell are sexual predators still allowed to walk our streets. This ain’t no jungle so why act like some sort of sick animal.
There should be a needle for the likes of you, your not welcome, you belong in a zoo, Lions need to eat, maybe you should become their daily feast.
So many times recently I’ve heard the words Human Rights, well if you do wrong towards the youngsters you don’t deserve that right, your just wrong, they shouldn’t apply. I don’t care, you crossed the line.
See it all the time on daily feeds, another child abused, perished,another life destroyed, you make me feel sick, what the hell makes you tick.
Give me a few moments in your company, you’ll never do it again,I promise you, job done without the jury, don’t waste time or public money, spend it on Pentobarbital and be done with it. Life over. No lengthy sentence, turn your lights out, like I said, Your kind aren’t welcome.
It’s not all sexual but physical and mental. Knock hard enough those scars will last a lifetime.
Let kids be kids not your punchbags, I’ve a black belt if you want to try a man not a child you scumbag.
Just gets under my skin how often you hear such devastating news.
These kids are simply children not government statistics, they’re victims because of some twisted individuals. They hide behind their smiles and chequebooks, cunning, disgraceful, deceptive criminals.
Some sicknesses just can’t be cured, time you left and gave those kids some inner peace, saved their innocence, erased those feelings.
Let them live life not fear it like you served them their own personal tortured sentence.
No fire without smoke, just hope all you sickos find a noose and choke.
To any paedophile,abusers whoever you are, I hope we never meet, I’ll read this again before you fall asleep.
This world is a beautiful place, it’s just spoilt by certain individuals who just don’t care.
Did Epstein sign himself out or was he ushered to save velvet blushes. Not the first time he served for the very same crimes.
Bet his circle decided they didn’t want a witness. They should all hang, their riches shouldn’t buy their silence.
So many rich & famous, should be stripped, injected, shunned by the public not allowed to flaunt in mansions like its a business. Think they can do whatever, their estates, wealth, assets should be shared amongst the victims of this disgusting, despicable act. Rubbing shoulders, bold as brass, these groups of dirty degenerates should be cast amongst the dark confides of a never ending pit, welcome to hell whilst they burn with their sins and lose everything.

Luke 17:2 – It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
By,
Lee David Wright

“My heart goes out to all the victims. May your strength find you in time, may your monsters fade into lost memories. May you find your smiles”.

Personal Battle Grounds….. By L D Wright

  • Are you ready to be shocked, please read the following blog post. See a much larger picture piece itself together. This post reflects the daily battles so so many face, you’ll be astounded by the actual figures. This is not a story of love, probably one of the saddest reality checks you’ll receive today, maybe forever. Please read on. 
  • 40 million casualties in WW1, 17 million deaths become the result of a world conflict. WW2 sent approximately 80 million to their graves, be that through conflict or famine. In two global wars almost 100 Million Men , Women and Children lost their rights to life. That’s almost the combined lives of a country the size of Egypt being wiped from its history. Not forgetting wars past and ongoing conflicts continually adding to daily tallies. What you have just read is shocking enough but what follows next did not take a war to create but what it does share is the realistic truth someone you may know, knew or might one day read about. What you read next is factual, the numbers are shockingly horrific but statistically true. If you are effected by what you are about to read then you have my deepest apologies, if your personally dealing with any issues related to this blog post then I urge you to take steps, be that ring a friend, talk to your G.P or get in touch with an organisation such as, The Samaritans on 116 123  https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/ UK—or  1 (800) 273-TALK – USA

We are a combined growing world population of 7.8 billion coupled together through 4200 different religions, beliefs scattered over 195 countries, governed by laws that seemingly break regardless. In 1948 it took a deceleration of Human rights to protect our lives that still too this day continue to fail people all over the world.

Looking at today’s statistics you are more likely to be killed by yourself, suicide outnumbered homicide by over double, now that’s a frightening realisation. Just think about that for a couple of seconds longer because I’m sure you’ll be has shocked as I. Global loss of life through murder, terrorism or conflict is still massively outnumbered by suicide. We really are our own worst enemy.

Almost 800,000 people worldwide decide enough is enough for one reason or another yearly. What has this world become if for that figure of every day people to feel the only way out was to literally end their own life. In just one decade approximately 8 million people will have been born to finally become a self extinguished memory. That’s like saying a city the size of New York will simply empty its streets of human life, how frightening is that. Without a war erupting, without one single act of terrorism, 8 million lost souls will fall by their own demise.

I pointed out earlier there are approximately 4200 religions, beliefs spread far and wide through the many borders of our lands, I ask where was their God when they became so low, so lost, so abandoned that on their darkest of days they would draw their last breaths. What had their lives led them into for the inevitable would outweigh the breaths we or most take for granted. A sad world of lost souls.

I almost ventured towards those mind boggling numbers not too long ago. The mere fact that I was visiting the edges of a thought that was or could quite easily have sent me to a place of no escape. It was in those very thoughts, scary day dreamt visions that I also felt the grip of depression take a hold of my hand as if it was a friend. I know of so many people who have not been as lucky as I, who gave up on life and their demons led them away, in most cases I’ve known of, only the quietest cries for help were made, so silent infact their deaths came as such a saddened shock to the many left to contemplate their final decision.

Within the next 100 years of life, say we are all lucky and fortunate enough to not witness another war and not one human being loses their life to the billions of bullets which would undoubtedly spray the whole world or the tons of bombs, missiles or any other insane act of war does not destroy, wreck or kill there will still be an astonishing 800 million people who will simply cease their daily lives by committing suicide. Look at it this way the entire population the size of Europe would in the next century just disappear into the daily obituaries. How is this even possible.

It’s written in the bible that to commit suicide is to commit a sin. In some religions it is deemed an almost noble act, the price you must pay. God did not shine an intence light of deterrence, no voice of any description spoke wisely at that most needed moment. Is it that God would welcome you with open arms regardless or is it that those millions of lost souls will just pass away, simply turning to dust and fade. The ever growing army of the needy and wanting are a formidable force that undoubtedly need so much more than God, they need help to help themselves before they can no longer. More needs to be done before it is in fact way to late.

A life is so much more important than any bullet, our journeys more complete without slabs or borders. A life should be lived not lessened by depression or war for that matter, why should so many lose to a camouflaged assassin that lives right beside those we cherish. Why should so many fall on their personal battle grounds, This illness that resonates the very core of our families to become a coroners signature.

Why???

By,

Lee David Wright

“Approximately every 40 seconds another person commits suicide, so whilst reading this post that next person in blowing out their own candle and saying goodbye to the world we are all part of”

I have a Question, Well I have a few….. By L D Wright

Is the soul our consciousness, is it our own separate entity that chose to share a life inside everyone of us. Does it leave when we no longer have the functionality, our eyes close and we float towards our next epic adventures.

Are angels glorious souls that earnt their superior right of flight. Are we all cocoons just awaiting evolution before we spread those multi coloured features & soar towards the next exciting stories. Does this game we call life only truly begin when we learn how to live without the need to survive.

Are ghosts just lost souls who weren’t ready to vacate this world, now wandering confused, second guessing next moves. Is there a light that shines like a beacon pointing the way to the next beautiful sequel. Do we pair up with the ones that left here before us, do our past ties interact like magnets connect us.

Does what we do in life reflect how far we rise, is there a limit to achievement, our mission, too strive, reach out. Is the universe endless and we all search in different directions, are we all adventurers,ancient astronauts, time traveller’s, we just haven’t worked out the coordinates. Did someone just reverse the process, press delete and simply left us. Is this why we’re so intent on travelling the cosmos. Is this ground our resting point we came to call earth. Is Déjà vu a life we just can’t remember but feels so much more than a little familiar, we gaze with blurred eyes of confusion.

Is God a caretaker, a scientist, are we the experiments created from an earth sized petri dish. Is Mother Nature related to each and every one of us, Why are we here, were do we go, well they’re the questions I’d like answers for.

By,

Lee David Wright

Send answers on a postcard.

“I can’t believe we strive to survive & simply cease to exist”

Feelings behind my last post 5-2-Life…… by L D Wright

So last week I wrote a piece called 5-2-Life. I’m still not completely sure where it came from, I’ve never been to prison yet I continued to write, edit, think, publish.

I suppose over the last twenty years plus I’ve locked myself in my own cell. Of course I was able to go about my daily duties, work, family, home, I must admit I didn’t put 100%into either so I suppose it eventually unravels towards your very own yellowbbrick road and it’s there you’ll realise your lacks and needs. I said last year I’ve felt like I’ve served my very own sentence,locked in the confides of my mind, past and present, losing my children sent me to places I wouldn’t wish on anybody. Hell really can be a place on earth. So I suggest a person can infact spend a huge portion of their life locked in their own prison, this being their past.

I’ve read some literature about the world being a prison, after all 99.99% of us will never leave this spinning globe we call earth until we sadly close our eyes and our minds just drift into the echoes of someone else’s thoughts.

I have always wanted to write, my blog started it’s journey last March, I hadn’t really started writing until around October 2018 but 50+blog entries later I’m still writing. To those who have read my blog then you’ll have witnessed me at some of my lowest points. I started through writing my past issues, feelings of loss, anxiety and depression. It was almost like a cry for help, as my blog became my personal therapist I began to relive my past so much so that my depression fell into freefall, I was living with my past firmly gripping, upset, anger, frustration seem to erupt. I started the blog as a beacon to others only to realise I desperately needed to say OK enough is enough, I need help. Now I have broke down to those closest to me at times especially when dates are looming but other than that I have to admit I just kept my feelings bundled up inside my mind, a torturous process I urge none of us to try. The words that poured out into my blog attempts were infact how I’d felt not only during some of my hardest times but in the cold light of day how I was still feeling and living with. It’s just so easy to say yeah I’m OK, probably easier because you just can’t say well actually no I’m really stressed and struggling with something that happened over twenty plus years ago. I think the pain and upset was just to much to admit, even to myself let alone a second person.

Towards the end of 2019 I sought the help I’m hoping will actually help me. I’m currently opening up to a counsellor, my second visit being today so early days but atleast I’m allowing myself to work on Me. Yes I was, am apprehensive, a little hesitant but I’m just going to answer the questions asked, honestly, calmly and hopefully the outcome is a more productive and positive one.

It’s like having a book sat on its shelf and never turning the pages, who knows what journey those words will send you to, if we don’t help ourselves then we can’t expect others to. We are only human so please except from time to time we are going to need guidance. It’s not a weakness to ask for help.

I often hear people’s views, sad to say I also have ignorantly said on occasion, oh you’ll be ok, brushed it off and not truly listened. It’s a shame we sometimes don’t have the readly needed assurances or answers or even the lack of knowledge to support others.

Over the past three years I have lost three family members, found out my father has been diagnosed with Parkinsons disease, undergone a hernia operation and brought back some demons that literally did not help matters at all, you could say I’ve had a lot to deal with but I’m not dealing with my father’s illness in the we he himself is, I know he’s not going to wake up tomorrow miraculously cured and that hurts me, I often wonder what he’s actually feeling deep down inside. Is he now feeling as lost as I have also felt with this illness now determining his fate. We all have a constant line of issues. We all need to address and admit them. I was so unwilling to share mine but I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m worth more than a personal prison cell and I’m hoping that by letting my words and thoughts out not only do I help myself but I also tick someone else’s boxes and they, you also find what you need to do. There you go I’m prompting you to seek any help you need. Unfortunately I don’t possess the necessary skills to free you from whatever binds you but I do hope you take whatever steps you need to get to where you want to be.

It’s a simple process of firstly admitting you need help, secondly picking up a phone and calling your G.P or do what I did and find local help through a counsellor. If you find yourself writing or continuously thinking something is wrong then more often than not it usually is so do myself and yourself a favour and go start the ball rolling, you never know it could change your life. It’s definitely a step in the right direction.

Regards, Lee

5-2-Life…..by L D Wright

5 – 2 – Life…..

They say we are free yet we’re governed by the hierarchy, supply anarchy and feel your rebellion extinguish your guilty pleasures. No wonder there’s so many lawless stories, your only free if you abide to your establishments law and orders. The only time your completely free is when that button comes down and we press delete. No pause, no escape, once we enter our journey starts, what we do in between reflects the life we lead.I often wonder what makes them tick, greed, stupidity, gang related or just brought up with it. Rarely is it down to bad luck, it’s a choice. You swapped your memory for a bunk.
I’d rather do a 9 – 2 – 5 than serve 5- 2 -Life. Just imagine if good behaviour was your only saviour, Maybe you should have just  lived life different, chose another route,made a wiser move. Instead you swapped your home address for a 12×8, half that if your in the States.

10.3million held behind bars worldwide, scarey when you say that out loud. I know we’re not completely free to do whatever but I’d rather be looking in from the outside than peeping through the bars of a confined. 

Considering there’s approximately 536.000 lifers not forgetting the ones still hatching plans with the next convicts targets, there’s always double bunks  when that gavel downs you.
Why gamble with the freedom we achieve, we may be a slave to a wage but we didn’t swap our homes for a cage. I’d rather minus 39 from the 168 than live life behind lock and keys of a prison gate. Is it an ever rolling snowball that engulfs the ones they leave. The circle they belong to, their crime waves they call lifestyles. 

I personally couldn’t bare to hear those doors locked daily, to have my  privalages taken. To be away from family, simple things I take for granted. I think I’d loose the plot, completely go stir crazy.They say crime doesn’t pay, so you might reap a small fortune,  whatever poison your pushing , drive the latest motor, get caught watch it all seized, dissappear, enter the guilty plea,  holiday at Her Majesty’s Pleasure, Welcome to your local Penitentiaries. 
Get a job, it’s definitely a lot less hassle. Your choice, I’ve made mine, I’ll leave it with you, You decide. 
By, L D Wright

5 – 2 – Life
Rather write a sentence than serve one

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