All my Love…..
It’s getting closer to that time of year, towards the times I’ve missed more than any other. Your birthday so close and then it’s Christmas, yet again no presents I’ll see you open.
By now you may have had a family of your own, a grandad, best present of them all. A festive dinner place you never filled, when I lost you I lost what meant the most to me.
Every year around this time you enter my thoughts more than ever, completely take my mind to totally different levels. Just get the 17th out the way then think about turning on those Christmas lights once again.
I miss my angels, all three of you. I try not to let it battle and batter me, it’s just so damn hard to live without you and the love I cherished. I’d have saved all my wishes for tomorrow’s visits.
I often look back and think about you, the times that we should have shared. I look up, blowing smoke rings towards the skies, tell you to all play nicely before sadly saying “goodnight”.
To be a father, such a proud time of life, a dream come true, so lucky to see them grow into adults, such a shame that didn’t happen. The heartache that lasts forever.
Growing older without you close leaves me feeling cold, your delicate hands no longer holding mine, given the chance I’d never let go. Shouldn’t have to live with memories that hurt this way but I still hold onto to the ones we made.
Carry you around in a few second snippets, no memories long enough to extend your visits. I miss you, I always will , I just hope, up there you still get to celebrate our festive season, hopefully one day I’ll see those presents opened.
Until then I’ll think about you often, hide the tears and hope too find the laughter whilst missing my little angels who made me a father.
All my love, Daddy…… xxx
By L D Wright